So I was cleaning out the closet and moved a box and BAM! The whole wall was black with mold.
Dean has been sick for a few days, and since he has allergy issues, I am betting that is what it is from; clothes filled with mold spores.
Here is a pic of that corner in the closet. Man it looks like we live in the slums, but I promise we have a nice apartment! Again, click the image to see the larger image.
Thanks for the compliment on the blog George. Since Dean and I share it, we take turns on the layout. This was his turn.
I got my diploma in the mail a few days ago. I thought I would be more excited about it, but what has it got me so far? I am basically a house wife. A week from tomorrow I have a meeting with a contact in Planned Parenthood, but it is only an information gathering thing and not an interview thing.
I really want a job because I feel so useless. lol I have a friend I have known since 5th grade who is now a stripper. She can make $500-$2500 a night. She told me to look into it as something to hold me over till I get a career job. If I had more self esteem, I would jump on the chance to make so much money.
Well I finally got the person that disowned me as a friend to understand that I am not a baby killer. I think that maybe I helped her understand that not all pro-choice advocates are evil. She now understands that I want to prevent the unintended pregnancies and she respects that.
I have been playing with some floor plans lately. It is my obsessive hobby. I think that if I am not happy with a career full of stress and beating my head against a wall, I might go to school for engineering/drafting to make floor plans. I really enjoy it and it makes me feel good. Here is a floor plan I actually went and saw. I made a few edits on it. Click it to see the large size (it is too big to fit here and look purty!).
I love many stories to a home. The bottom is my fav on this one. It has a garage and a HUGE open “game” room. For us it would be the computer/movie room. The second floor is pretty much one open space with a very large kitchen. The third floor most have 3 bedrooms, but the double master was my preferred option. I removed the walk in in the one room because I would rather have built ins. I see them as more efficient in clothes organization. The stairs in the floor plan don’t really show how cool they are. Think like a giant upside-down Y with the stem bent. There is a landing at the 3 point meeting place where one can choose to go to the send floor, down to the front door, or down to the game room. Next to the stairs going to the second floor are the ones up to the third floor. This makes the game room very secluded and I like that.
Well I am gonna get back to cleaning the house. God I never thought I would be a housewife.
I just sat here 5 min deciding what to open with, because I was taught in school that a good writer needs to have a good opening. For this post there isn’t one, so I will just dive in.
A person I have known for most of my life told me today that I don’t deserve the air that I breathe, much less the right to live.
This was in response to a post I made on a site. I reposted a story about a woman who last week was denied emergency contraception. You might want to read the story before reading the rest of the post so you have an understanding of the situation. You can find it here.
I wish I could change the way I am. I wish I could be happy with interior design or architect, but I can’t. I don’t have a choice in what I will do the rest of my life. You may think that sounds strange, but the only way I can describe it is a calling. It is very similar to what super religious people have. I just don’t have a choice.
I will spend the rest of my life working towards a society where only people who want to get pregnant have children. I will spend the rest of my life banging my head against a wall of religious morals and beating myself with the Bible belt. I will spend the rest of my life talking to as many people as I can and teaching them about their bodies and how to control them. I will spend the rest of my life making posts like this every time my non-choice career causes me to loose a person I called friend.
I CANNOT IGNORE THIS CALLING AND IT CAUSES ME SO MUCH HURT AND PAIN!
but I
don’t
have
a
choice
Well I am back to normal now and I took my last steroid over the weekend. I wish I could take them forever because my skin has never been so healthy! My face glows and the redness and dryness that is usually my nose cleared up and so soft! I guess that is another draw back to birth control. It monkeys with hormones that keep you young!
Well I sent a note to my dad. I just created a simple card with the left over supplies from graduation that said “I miss you”. I think I will make another today just from a lack of something else to do.
Hopefully I will get a job soon. I have sent out e-mail to many places and today I will start calling to confirm they the mail was received and try to get my foot in the door somewhere. I never thought it would be so hard to find a sex education job, but apparently in Texas it is not common.
This past weekend was okay. Friday was so excellent that Saturday and Sunday seemed to suck because of the greatness of Friday. We lit up the grill and drank some wine, port to be more specific. It was nice and cool out so the fire was enjoyable. We ate dinner on the coffee table with the pillows that Harriet made us. We use out dinning room for our 19 foot computer desk so we do not have an actual dinning table. But it was nice, with good food, candles, and laughs (mostly at me from drinking 3 glasses of port with is 20% alcohol by volume!).
I also FINALLY sent out thank you cards for the graduation gifts. Money is so tight that I bought the cards with one paycheck and had to wait till the next to afford the stamps. I did not 100% custom make these like the invitations, but I got to design them and add little thinks that made them unique.
Last night Dean bleached my roots so I could re-pink today. In case you are wondering, I have to re-pink every 10 days or so, but it is easy. The pink is only pigment and take 10 min to put on. About every 2 months I have to bleach the new hair growth (my hair grows very slow), so at this moment I have 2 inches of white hair at the roots with the rest pink. It looks cool when it is wet! Sometime today I will re-pink and then get a way over due hair cut. I usually get a hair cut once a year (again my hair grows slow and I never blow dry or curl it so it does not get extra damage) and it has been over a year since my last one and my ends are kinda uneven (hair grows in a swirl pattern not all at once).
Well I guess I will start calling around and see if I can get anywhere. As soon as I get any word I will post about it. I can’t wait to be DINKs (duel income no kids) and can’t wait till money crunches are a thing of the past. If we can get to a point where all of our bills are auto paid and have a little left over I will be happy! I don’t want to be rich; I just don’t want to have to worry about money!
This is really a question for George to answer since he has first hand experience in this department, but I welcome any other suggestions and comments.
My dad has not made any effort to talk to me for a month. The last I talked to him was at 10am on August 12th, but I want that to change.
I know that none of you think that I should mail the letter I wrote and posted on my blog, but I want to send something to let him know that I still care. I don’t think I can call because I do not think I could control my emotions and I would just break down and show him how much he hurt me. I think he knows, but given the chance to talk to him I think I would make sure he knows, and I don’t think he needs that. He is already in hell and he does not need me to turn up the heat.
So if I write a letter or something, then I can control myself, but I need to know what to say to a man who is damming himself to his own hell.
I thought about just doing a series of letters, one a day, just a quick note. Something to the effect of “I love you because ______ (fill in the blank) and send one every day. Something to let him know I am here and I really do care and miss him. Something that he can look forward to every day.
I don’t expect he will call, or write back ever, but I know he will read it over and over and keep it forever. He thinks he is the last romantic left on earth and that he should have been born in the time knights fought in the honor of their love.
I could write drippy, dopey, emotional stuff, but I don’t know if that would help him. George, you were once were he is today, what can I say to him? What can I do to help?
