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Archive for June, 2006

OMG it starts!

Well today at 4pm I have my first of at least 2 interviews. This one is with the UNT paper, and the other with the Dallas Morning News.

I am so scared! I have been IMing Dean and Val since I found out to try and get some moral support because I am freaking out. I know it’s no big deal, but my lack of self confidence is telling me I am going to screw up somehow or forget something.

Of course Dean and Val said I have nothing to worry about and I will be fine, that does help a lot! Thanks!

I will post tonight after my class on how it went. I have class till 9:20 so it might be a while!


You’re #1!!!

Was the title of her e-mail:

Kaston–
Joseph just wrote to inform me that he won’t be graduating until May 2007. So, you’re our first. Nancy Kolsti, Senior public information officer of the UNT News Service (part of the University Relations, Communications and Marketing Office) will be contacting you for an interview and photo. I’m going to forward her your resume with your contact information. Members of the SoS outside advisory board may be contacting you as well. Can you deal with all the fame?!
Dr. M

OMG VAL I NEED YOU PR HELP! Do I prepare a speech? Do I ask the interviewer for her questions to do as “homework”? Do I pull it out of my ass as I go?

If there ever was a better example of positive stress (other than raising a child) I would like to see it.


Self Pride

I just got the e-mail from the director of the Study of Sexualities minor I am getting. I took a class with her and we get along great. We ran into each other last semester and we spoke a bit about me graduating and the program:

Hi Kaston,
We had an advisory board meeting for the SoS program last night and the members were excited to hear of our first graduates. They thought it would be good to publicize this with newspaper articles and a party in Dallas. Would you be interested in participating? They would like to talk to you about your experience of the program and hear your suggestions on the direction it should take in the future. When exactly do you graduate? I remember last time I saw you you said you’d be
interested in promoting the program–are you going to be staying in the area after you graduate? We’re starting to talk about student internship positions. Looking foward to hearing from you–please forgive me if I don’t answer you e-mails immediately–I’m coming in very irregularly this summer–usually only when I need to make a library run. I’m hiding away at home trying to get that book written!
Best,
Dr. Morris

Dr. Morris,
I am graduating August 12th, will I be the first with the minor to graduate? I would LOVE to do anything I can to further the program. I am actually trying to find my niche now for a job. I cannot just look on Monster jobs for “sex educator”, so any help in jobs would be great. As is, the only option I have found is Planned Parenthood, which I love, but I do not know if I would be able to do exactly what I want there. I have attached my post graduation resume, it might give you an idea of how much this minor means to me! I am so very proud of it, I only wish it were my major!

Feel free to give me a call:

-Kaston

I just got mail back from her, I will be tied to be first to graduate with the minor for UNT.

Wow a pary and a newspaper article! I am gonna be famous before I thought ;)


Medieval Homosexuality

The following is a paper I wrote for my history class:

Homosexuality
in the Middle Ages: A website review

This is summary of a paper written by Paul Halsall in 1988. After extensive research on the topic of homosexuality in medieval times, I discovered that Halsall’s paper contained within most all the information the other websites had to offer. The ideas expressed are his own with the links being my contribution to further explain concepts , people, and places. All links are from Wikipedia.org so there can be no claims to “smutty” links in the paper. Please use your own discretion when following links (some of which contain graphic content and/or images). If you prefer not to read and/or see graphic material, do not follow the links on sexual behavior.

There is considerable evidence on the existence of homosexual relationships, acts, and marriages during the Middle Ages. Homosexuals during this time were not confined to one group, be it social, economic, or geographical. Even though the term “homosexual” was not coined until 1896 by Karl-Maria Kertbeny, it is not exceeding difficult to find other means of identifying the topic. Paul Halsall’s work goes in-dept on this issue and looks at many facets on homosexuality during the Middle Ages.

With the introduction and dominance of Christianity, sexuality during the middle ages was quickly squelched. Before this time, sex was not taboo and was associated with a sort of bodily transcendence instead of the sin of the flesh the Christian doctrine preached. Saints Jerome and Ambrose taught that sex linked the spirit to carnality. Saint Augustine argued that sex was permissible as long as it was only for procreation, was in the missionary position and was not pleasurable. Since for procreation to occur there must be ejaculation which is paired with male orgasms (pleasure), this idea only punished women. A woman does not have to orgasm to become pregnant (although it does increase the chances slightly) so only her pleasure was forbidden. It was also considered sinful to have the woman on top or from behind.

The fact all other forms for intercourse were banned by the Christians gives evidence to the existence of other methods. The same logic applies to homosexual partnerships. One of the leaders of Christianity, Bishop Grosseteste of Lincoln, wrote a handbook for confessions for such sexual sins as homosexuality and contained within evidence that heterosexual couples also engaged in anal intercourse. For heterosexual couples, this was used as a type of birth control; both could have sexual gratification with out worry of pregnancy.

The thirteenth century when was the condemnation of homosexuals began in Christianity. Homosexuals were not singled out, but grouped with Jews, lepers, and heretics in their treatment by the church. The churches views were not, however, shaped by religion but instead reflected social changes in the society. In other societies throughout time, homosexuality was present and accepted.

Geographically speaking, the only place where homosexuality thrived was in urban areas because the large areas grew many subcultures within it. In Italian towns, marriage was delayed and thus left many sexually mature people available to experiment with each other. It must be noted that experimentation does not mean one is homosexual, but males who were homosexual had extended time to figure out their sexual orientation. Many of those chose to enter the monastery to avoid a marriage that would violate their orientation.

It seems that the largest issue with men having sexual relations with other men was the concept of dominance. The missionary position created a sexual hierarchy; one person had to “dominate” (be on top), while the other was “passive” (be on the bottom). Since this was the only position accepted by the church, it put women in a permeate passive, subservient, receiving position. This bled over into the criticisms of homosexuals because a man was not in anyway supposed to be passive, subservient, or taking a “woman’s role”.

Literature of the time is a great resource to use when determining the prevalence of homosexuality. Hebrew and Spanish poetry frequently refers to the love and romance of young boys and is very similar to ancient Greek forms. Yishaq ben Mar-Saul in the eleventh century was the first poet to write homo erotic poetry. An example of this Jewish poetry is as follows:

Like Joseph in his form,
like Adoniah his hair.
Lovely of eyes like David,
he has slain me like Uriah

During the twelfth century in France, poetry can be found from bishops like Baudri of Bourgueil. They were not as blunt in their descriptions as the Jews, and concentrated on pederasty. Ivo of Chartres was more specific, including references to sodomy and fellatio. Monks were also popular sources of homosexual literature. Anselm (who had an affair with monk Osbern) and Aelred of Rievaulx are great examples. They wrote to other monks about love and friendship between males in the twelfth century, which is the first evidences of writings on the topic. Saint Peter Damian believed that homosexual activity was present in his clerics in Italy.

Homosexual tendencies were also found in other organizations which had mainly male memberships. The aristocratic elites of Northern France spent large amounts of time with other men, most importantly was in knight training. Again here, marriage was put off for a time which encouraged more homosexual behavior. Richard I of England, a noted night, was know for his homosexual relationship with his brother-in-law. Alcuin, in the court of Charlemagne, had a circle that wrote erotic letter to each other. The Norman court of William Rufus were admonished by Saint Anselm for wearing long hair and having naked boys run around the court.

Universities at this time were male only, and thus it is to be expected to see homosexual behavior. 1219 found homosexuals in the Paris University, and in Paris proper by 1230.

Paul Halsall did an excellent job in bringing knowledge of Medieval homosexuality into a neat package. When he published the material to a website, he noted that he was a graduate student at the time. He also noted: “I would change some, perhaps many of the conclusions, and certainly the theoretical approach. In particular I would emphasis the position of large aggregates of human beings [i.e. cities and monasteries] as a necessary but not sufficient pre-condition for homosexual sub-cultures.”

As seen in this review, most only males are discussed because they were the dominate sex during the time. This is not to say that medieval lesbians did not exist, they did, but their stories were kept mostly to themselves and very little from this period survives of them. Whether you accept, reject, or feel ambivalent towards homosexuality, it exists now, existed in the past, and will continue to exist in the future.


Am I selfish?

Maybe I am overlooking something or maybe I am over stressed about school, but I feel like I am playing mommy to Dean lately. He got a lot of slack during is crunch time; I did not ask much of him at all because he had very little time to himself. I did most of the chores, made all the food, and didn’t complain a peep when he played his game (World of Warcraft).

But now his crunch is over and mine is here with 9 hours of school in 5 weeks. The house is a mess. There are dishes that need to be done. I still cook, go shopping, tend the animals (except the litter box, that is Dean’s job), and tend him.

Whenever I ask Dean to do something, he does it, no questions, but he cannot do it without me asking. I tried once to make a list of his chores (dishes, vacuuming, trash, and litter box) and spread them out over 6 days, but that did not work.

I don’t have the patience to ask because with so much stress, I know it will come out wrong. He knows I am going nuts with this semester, and he sees the house declining, but does nothing for it.

I got out of class an hour and a half early (4 hour class) and called him to let him know as much. I thought maybe knowing that he might make dinner or something, but I come home to see him in his usual place: in his boxers, at his computer, playing his game. Desk a mess, dishes not done, mud from his roller blades on the carpet, dirty laundry lying around, ect. And he sits playing a fictional character in his underwear barley aware of my existence even though I am literally a foot away.

You might ask why I am writing this? Well I am kinda miffed and I do not want to take it out on Dean because I love him and no one deserves to be treated disrespectfully. Maybe he will read this in a few days and I will come home to a clean house and some dinner, but that might be asking a little much.

We both work hard, but these 5 weeks of class the house needs a little more work from him because I do not have the time or will to do much. LOL going shopping was like a mini-vacation from school. How sad!

So the question remains, am I being selfish in wanting Dean to pick up more slack?